TWJ 19

We were supposed to go camping in North Carolina this past weekend. It would have been a great blog post, I'm sure, but then I realized I just wasn't quite willing to live it. "Here is Jane screaming for 13 hours in the car..." "Here is Jane with a blow-out diaper on the trail..." "Here is Jane eating while she's attacked by mosquitos..." Hmm, I guess some things do change with a baby... ;)

So instead we stayed home, had brunch at the neighbor's, and spent a fun afternoon at the pool with the Seiberts. Great decision, I'd say.

Jane also spent some time with her friend, Luke. He's on our "Approved List of Suitors." A bit premature to be thinking of such things, I suppose, but as my dad says, looks like the dog's sniffin'... ;)

Seriously, though, sometimes it strikes me how quickly Jane is growing up-- that we'll blink and she'll be driving or graduating or getting married and having babies of her own. She's only four months old, you say, quit being so dramatic. I know, I know. But I looked at newborn pictures the other day and already she's a different Jane. And it makes me so excited and sad at the same time.

Excited to see the Jane she is becoming-- the peaceful, contented, perceptive Jane who takes everything in with wide-eyed wonder. The crazy-haired, squinty-smiled, grabs-everything-and-sticks-it-in-her-mouth Jane who knows just how to make us melt.

Excited to imagine the Jane she will become-- as Jane's 10-year-old cousin Emma wrote in a precious note, "Dear Baby Jane, I can't wait to see you grow up. I hope God puts an amazing heart in you and I know that you will be loving to everyone. Your parents are going to grow you up to be an active, brave, and adventurous little woman. I know you are going to be a great helper if you have other brothers or sisters. I always wonder if you are going to be fancy or you're going to love hiking and going on trips. I hope you stay soooooo healthy!" I wonder these things about Jane too, and I sure hope she takes after her cousin Emma!

And yet, as eager as I am to discover these "future Janes," I also feel sad to leave behind the Janes of the past-- the snuggly newborn Jane, the #1 Baby Jane, the cross-her-feet-while-she-nurses Jane. And we're only 4-months in! Do all moms feel this way-- do all moms live so torn???

Here's to being thankful for the past, savoring the present, and anticipating the future!